"I felt it was time to play. Most of my thoughts, time and energy had gone into creative effort. And this restriction of the love drive, the headshrinkers will tell you, is the greatest urge one really has. When one sublimates the sex drive into creative work it puts a person on high gear, mentally. I admit it. But it's against my nature to bottle up the biological plans of pleasure for any length of time. I hope I don't sound as if I have discovered the secret salve that soothes the universe, but I do want to add my small footnote on the subject.
This quote resonates with me recently. Though I haven’t been pouring myself into creative efforts I have been placing a majority of my attentions on the responsibilities of life. Like all women I wear many hats. That of a wife, mother, sister, daughter, employee, etc. I have for many months been neglecting my own pleasure. I have been aware of the growing neglect but have made only mediocre attempts to correct it.
In the world of “no pain = no gain” it becomes easy, especially for women, to place others needs and desires above our own in the pursuit of being the perfect wife, perfect mother, perfect employee. In my case it also became a cop out of sorts. Lets face it – being true to yourself and your desires takes courage, gusto and determination.
While I do not have all the answers I do know something’s gotta give. Pleasure is a choice - a decision to enjoy ones life. I want every day to be about pleasure, passion and fulfillment - not a special treat on my Birthday or Anniversary. I want to create a life where pleasure is the rule rather than the exception. Does this sound selfish? Maybe. Or perhaps that is what our puritanical society has conditioned us to feel.
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”